Howdy Hanoi

After our couple of days in HCMC, we jetted off to Hanoi. The alternative was a 41 hour train journey, so we were quite happy with another decision to fly instead.

Hanoi is the capital of Vietnam, but you knew that.

A random picture of some particularly nice spring rolls

We arrived, and were pleasantly surprised to find that whilst yes, it was busy, it didn’t seem quite as manic as HCMC or Bangkok. Hooray! We stayed at a very comfortable hotel in the Old Quarter of the city, set amongst mazes of stalls and restaurants, near a famous lake. On our first night, we wandered down to the lake, and got our bearings - the story goes that an ancient Vietnamese emperor was given the gift of a sword from the gods, which he used to defeat the enemies of his country. Afterwards, when he had finished with it, a giant golden turtle snatched it from him, and took it to the bottom of the lake, back to the gods. Since then, there have been a couple of small temples on the water. It was very pretty at night (and so was the lake).

Pesky turtle

For our first full day, we explored the national museum (interesting if a bit on the dry side), and Zoe had a nosey in to some art galleries. We then joined the crowds exploring the lake temple, and afterwards got slightly, err, scammed.

So! Picture this. You’re walking along the busy streets of Hanoi quite happily, when all of a sudden someone shouts, points at your feet and rushes after them with glue. This happened to Zoe, and came as quite a shock, at first we were both wondering if there was some particularly poisonous bug on her person. Essentially, her shoes are older than time itself, and are starting to fray at the edges quite a bit. In a flash, he had taken off her shoe, and was polishing, filing, gluing, and... replacing the sole with a piece of car tyre? After he had finished, he asked for a king’s ransom - 700,000 Dong, to be precise, or $35. In the real world, this isn’t a huge amount of money, but when you consider that a beer here is $0.50, a massage is $5 for an hour, and a decent hotel room is $15 for a night, this was literally daylight robbery, and he was very loudly adamant that he was owed it. In the end, we haggled him down to less than half what he had originally asked for, but we know it was still astronomical in local terms. Grr.

Tyre-riffic, right?

Oh yeah, and all the while, a friend of his had wrestled my shoes from me, and was furiously polishing them, demanding equal recompense for his labours. Some more frustrating negotiation later, and we were slightly lighter of pocket and heavier of spirit - this sort of thing happens every now again, all around the world, but it certainly leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. If we’d had the energy, we might have refused to pay anything, but in the end we opted for a quieter life, whether that was right or wrong.

So! We let off steam for a little bit, and then were back at it (I think finding a Kinder egg that afternoon made a big difference to our spirits - it was Easter after all!!). Later, we went out for tasty beef noodle soup at a place full of locals (which is always a good sign). The menu was small (another good sign!), and we were served quickly. Interestingly, this was the first place we’d been after nearly a month in Asia where chopsticks were the only utensils available, which was a slight hurdle, but we persevered and thrived!

The girl's toy was a hairclip, and the boy got a transforming car. How is THAT fair? Needless to say, Zoe got the car.

The recommended viewing for that night was Apocalypse Now, a much darker take on the Vietnam war (or as it’s called here, the American War). Zoe didn’t fall asleep, so it must have been good.

For our last full day in Hanoi, we went hunting for culture! In the morning, was the “Hanoi Hilton”, the prison where American POWs had been held during the war (in very comfortable conditions, from what we saw). Interestingly, this place had a much darker history, and had been used to imprison Vietnamese people who were seen to be a threat to the French rulers at the time. The plaques were particularly interesting, describing how even the inhumane conditions imposed by the oppressors did nothing to stifle the spread of revolutionary teaching through the cells amongst the righteous. Perhaps true, but I imagine also a significant degree of history being told by the victors? In those conditions, I don’t think I would be very interested in my further education.

Guillotine

After that, we hopped across town, to Ho Chi Minh’s district. Remember how I said I’d go into more detail on just how much the Vietnamese loved him? Well, it was so much that when he died, they ignored his wish for a simple burial, and instead stuffed and embalmed his body, erecting a grand mausoleum to keep his pickled person prominent, in the fashion of Mao, Lenin, Stalin, Kim Il Sung, and Kim Jong Il. Notice a theme? Anyway, my favourite fact about this particular mausoleum was the fact that Uncle Ho spends 2-3 months a year on holiday in Russia, getting a thorough servicing!

Ho Chi Minh's Mausoleum

We weren’t interested in seeing that grim exhibit (particularly as it was against the man’s wishes!), so steered clear. We tried to learn more about him in a nearby museum, but it was closed, boo! Still, nevermind, that’s what the internet is for. Instead, we saw an interesting ‘One Pillar Pagoda’ nearby, and met an enthusiastic cyclo-taxi driver, who offered to show us some more of the sights.

One Pillar Pagoda

After some negotiation, we lurched into the busy streets to our next destination, a famous site where a B-52 bomber had crash-landed after being shot down in the war. It left an impressive carcass, so was left in place, and we were amazed to see just how big the bones of this thing were - truly, we can see why it was called a ‘Sky Fortress’, and it struck me (as it has many other before) just how interesting a conflict this had been - despite infinitely overwhelming firepower, in the end the USA failed to overcome the power of an idea.

The B-52 carcass, looking from the cockpit

Big numbers for big nerds

We ended our day of culture with a water puppet show, which is an ancient artform which emerged from cultures centred around rice paddies. It was impressive, though neither of us feel the burning desire to seek out any more - one was enough! That night, we drank tasty wine in an Italian restaurant, because home comforts are needed from time to time.

The next day, we were off on a cruise!

Hello Ho Chi Minh City

So yes! I left Kampot in fairly poor spirits, having otherwise had an excellent time there. Maybe I’ll go back one day to tidy up unfinished business, and finally tackle the dino-rib challenge.

We got a bus back to Phnom Penh, ready for the next leg of our journey towards the further east. What should have been a three hour ride stretched beyond four, and we were pretty exhausted by the time we made it back to PP in the evening. At this stage, we were faced with the prospect of an 8am bus the next day to Ho Chi Minh City, scheduled to take 6.5 hours. Frankly, I was still pretty green around the gills at this point, and some quick research online showed us that equivalent flights were pretty reasonable, and took 45 minutes instead, so, sorry mother nature, but we made a very easy decision and flew instead, arriving in comfort in Vietnam, our third country of the trip!

Of course, getting through immigration took nearly as long as the bus journey would have done, but shush you. That’s not the point.

Ho Chi Minh City! Named after Mr Chi Minh himself, the father of the country, who’s very name means ‘Bringer of Light’. Having done a little reading about his country in the airport, we were excited to see it. Essentially, Vietnam has been under the thumb from various groups for hundreds and hundreds of years - first the Chinese for aeons, then the French for a century, and finally the USA for decades. Ho Chi Minh was instrumental in Vietnamese independence, and is rightly celebrated in their country.

He led the call for independence from the French after WW2, and succeeded! Then, when the Americans started propping up the government of South Vietnam, he led the resistance against them in his efforts to re-unify the country. Sadly he died before seeing this happen, but the people are, it’s fair to say, quite fond of him (more on just how fond to come…).

Ho Chi Minh City, or HCMC as I shall henceforth call it, was a hive of activity similar to Bangkok but not quite as developed - where there we found three or four levels of traffic (canal, subway, road and sky train), here seemed to be the same number of people (on motorbikes), crammed into one road at a time. We arrived pretty late, and went out for food before retreating to our hotel (me still with zero appetite and looking miserable, apparently!).

By this stage, we had seen more than our fair share of big Asian cities, and we were starting to look ahead and see that even three months isn’t long enough to see everything we wanted to, so even before arriving in HCMC, we had decided to stay there only two nights before moving on to the north of the country, which we were very excited about.

So, we had but one full day in HCMC. I was still feeling pretty sorry for myself, so as much as we were really keen to go and see examples of the tunnels used by the Vietcong to hide from US troops and keep their supplies coming from the north, the idea of a three hour round trip to get there put paid to those plans. Oh well! Instead, we went to the Reunification Palace, which had previously been to seat of power for the South Vietnamese government during the war, and has been kept pretty much as it was found in 1978 when troops from the north drove a tank through the front gate and planted their flag.

It was an interesting exhibit, with abandoned tanks and jets outside, and a mixture of state rooms and war bunkers to explore inside. A favourite feature of mine was the meditation room at the top of the building, initially designed for the ruler to sit in and look out in all four directions when making important decisions regarding matters of state, but re-fitted with bomb-proof glass once things started turning south (or rather, north). There were nice views of the city all around, and a helicopter parked up just in case on a roof nearby.

Escape Route

After that, it was lunch. I was starting to feel human again, halleluiah! After that, it was the War Remnants museum, with more stunning machines of war outside, and a variety of interesting exhibits inside.

The piece that shocked both of us the most was a display on photojournalists in the Vietnam war - they had elected to hilight photos taken by people who had died in the war, with particular emphasis on their final roll of film. This, combined with displays on the legacy of Agent Orange and some galling infographics (for example, more bombs dropped in the Vietnam war than WW2), left us pretty stunned afterwards. The museum closed before we could see everything we wanted, which was a shame, as this was the best one we had seen on our travels to date - would certainly like to have spent more time there.

But, the world kept spinning and we watched Good Morning Vietnam that night, as some much-needed comic relief. The next day, was a flight to Hanoi, in the North of the country...

Carry on Kampot

After our adventures up North, we decided that we had enjoyed Siem Reap so much that we weren't quite ready to leave Cambodia, so me and Matt made the decision to explore one of the quieter, less touristy parts of the country by the South coast, in a small riverside town called Kampot.

So after getting the bus back to Phnom Penh, we ended up staying the night and heading off to Kampot the next day on yet another GiantIbis bus (fair to say we are huge advocates!). I think that Kampot ended up becoming our favourite place in Cambodia - we ended up extending our stay to 5 days in total and it was fantastic.

I think a big part of it must have been our hotel, which was in a beautiful location by the riverside overlooking the jungle and the nearby mountains. It was run by a couple of expats (known by locals as the Pot-Pats) who were interesting and friendly. They also had a couple of dogs that were a little less friendly,  but admittedly cuter, and spent their days lazing around by the pool... Aww.

So on our first night we chilled out and enjoyed the sunset from here, quite happy that there were a few less ants and mozzies than we had expected! We also had a visit to the heart of the action via tuk tuk and sampled some of the local foodie specialities such as beef saraman with peanuts (I'm clearly no food critic but this was truly top notch).

On day two we decided to explore the town by bicycle as these were available for hire from our hotel and we decided it would be a nice change from being escorted around by taxis and tuk-tuks. (We really wanted to take out the scooters but decided this would be a sensible stepping stone). The roads in Phnom Penh and Bangkok felt like a bit of a death trap and the traffic was manic, but it was so much quieter here (people averaging at about 20km an hour) that it felt safe enough. We had heard off the grapevine that due to the packs of dogs guarding houses en route, it  wasn't safe to walk to and from town, especially at night. Supposedly there exists some gang culture amongst the dogs here and they can send angry signals to each other across the town! So we gave that one a miss.

We cycled to town, (which apparently takes a bit more man power in 34 degree heat), visiting lake in the centre that was brimming with lotus flowers, and stopped for lunch at a recommended cafe called Epic Arts. We grew to love this place! The food was superb and we became regulars for a couple of days on the trot. A few of the people who work here are disadvantaged and the cafe provides excellent opportunities for them too. (You know we love our ethical eateries!)

We enjoyed our bike ride but I think after this day we developed some major moto envy, so decided to rent some of the 2 wheeled wonders from the hotel. I'm not sure if they were automatic motorbikes or scooters.. But anyway! We were given a quick 3 minute dummies-guide to motorbikes and the keys were handed over... And voila -Cambodian driving licences earned! Bet you didn't know it would be this easy - we didn't either! I think we must have looked quite ridiculous when we first set off, wobbling around at 5mph and trying to figure out how to indicate. But we picked it up eventually. It was scary and exciting in equal measures! The hardest thing actually was finding a nearby petrol station, however we overcame this obstacle after a disgruntled shuttle around a few roundabouts. (We also got given some free biscuits when we filled our tanks - not a perk you get in jolly old England!)

And so, with full tanks of petrol and copious amounts of suncream we were ready to embark on our grand adventure! We ended up heading to Nut Hill and Fish Island, which are quiet scenic areas by the coast. After some easy roads we eventually got to a dirt track which winded its way through the salt flats and countryside, it was lovely! We arrived at Hut hill and felt a massive sense of achievement when we could finally see the sea, ahhh! We knew at this stage that Matts navigational skills hadn't let us down and he had indeed succeeded in not taking us back to Phnom Penh (not that I doubted him for a second, tee hee).

When we arrived here there was a cute little hut with a hammock overlooking the sea and some curious little islands in the distance. There were also some Cambodians nearby who were enjoying a picnic and offered us a drink-further evidence that the Cambodians are lovely people. Overall the motorbike ride was a fantastic experience, apart from one minor kerfuffle (which is a story for a later date I think!)

But the best part of the day was yet to come! We had read, in the Kampot survival guide (a very funny book written by an experienced Pot-Pat) that a great place to go for food was The Rusty Keyhole, which specialises in it's BBQ Ribs imported from Australia, so we decided to pay a visit. There was a photo board hall of fame for the "Dino Challenge", which is basically a competition to see if you can manage to eat 1.5 kilograms of ribs within one hour. There was a losers board and a winners board. We spent some time speculating about whether or not Matt (or me!) could accomplish this grand feat! We didn't opt in to the challenge, but we did have some excellent food here!

On day 4 we arranged a tour of Bokor Mountain and the surrounding attractions. We originally wanted to go hiking but the mountainous areas around are apparently difficult to navigate due to the forested areas (not to mention, the threat of landmines), so we decided to opt for the guided tour instead. This took us around some interesting sights, and whilst we did have some Moto envy, we enjoyed some of the great views from the top. We explored some interesting temples, an abandoned Casino (spooky), and the nearby lake which apparently sports a beautiful waterfall at certain times of year. We were a bit late in the season for this!

Creepy abandoned church...

Aaaand, creepy abandoned casino.

After this we had a boat tour down the river at sunset. It stopped at a bar by the river and we had a beer here. There was an option to go swimming but after hearing about one mans stomach problems after taking a few dips by the banks, we decided not to! On our way back, we stopped to look for fireflies before heading back to town for more tasty food. Another lovely day!

On our final full day in Kampot we hired out some of the Kayaks from the hotel and went for a pootle on the river. The locals make it look so easy and have these boats that they can stand up in, that only need one oar?! The kayaks weren't quite as easy here, maybe due to the currents and the wind. It was suggested that we take a circular route around through the mangroves and we were given a map. We were lead to believe it was an easy route because apparently only one person in the history of ever had found themselves getting lost. It was a little bit confusing in parts because there was so much jungle and a few islands. But nevertheless, it felt very Indiana Jones and we enjoyed the adventure! And in the true spirit of Indiana, I ended up losing my hat in the water somewhere. I never did get it back! There was also a growing wind on our way back to the hotel that made the rowing home a lot more difficult. But all in all, no disasters and great fun. We were very happy that, as well as not being the second people to ever get lost kayaking around there, we also managed to make our way back to the hotel without any additional assistance, or indeed capsizing! So we felt very proud of ourselves, overall.

What could go wrong??

Spot the hat 

Later that afternoon we headed to Seeing Hands, which is a massage parlour that appears all over South East Asia. Interestingly it is run by blind people. Apparently a few fake ones have appeared though, which either exploit the blind or end up being run by people who aren't actually blind! We were a little skeptical once we arrived there because the lady at the desk clearly did have vision! Anyway, she took us to a room and made us put what looked like prisoner pyjamas on (a bit concerning). But the two blind people arrived eventually! Turns out that it was a Thai style massage which involved some wrestling, twisting and elbowing. Matt said that he felt like his arms were longer afterwards. Not sure about that one! It was definitely a worthwhile experience anyway, and we would recommend it to anyone in this neck of the woods.

That night, we decided to head back to our much loved Rusty Keyhole for the Last Supper, as Matt had been umming and ah-ing about the Dino Rib Challenge for days and we didn't want to leave any unfinished business in Kampot. Unfortunately once we got there he was starting to feel ill so this never materialised (definitely for the best). He had some kind of food poisoning, it turns out. Bless! And spent the next day with ice cubes on his head looking sad. He didn't even eat one of the delicious banana and Nutella pancakes from the hotel the following morning, so he must have been ill! I should probably mention that he made a grand recovery in Vietnam and I like to think that overall, that didn't taint our memories of Kampot too much.

We never did find out if Matt could have conquered the Dino Rib Challenge though. We may never know!